A beautiful piece, Ako! I love the personal accounts you shared and the essence of falling in love with yourself! ‘Instead, go deeper into what gives you joy.’ So many gems in here to pick out, but I will take this one with me today. Your newsletter messages resonate and stick with me throughout the day. For this I am grateful, thank you! 🙌
Thank you, Kelly! Yes to falling in love with ourselves! I told my daughter the other day, respect is like water. It seeks its level. No one will give her more respect than the respect she offers herself. And I thought, probably the same for Love.
I appreciate your vulnerability and honesty in this writing Ako. I'm struck by what good advice this is even for those who are still in relationship, and have been for some time. The practice of self-connection, choosing yourself, updating your profile, that goes on all the time in the midst of an established healthy relationship as well. My wife and I are going on 20 years together. Fortunately we're both willing to keep doing our own work and that's what keeps us close.
I'm inspired to hear about your journey with your wife and how you see the practice of coming together (dating) apply to matured relationship (20 years together, marriage as a relationship framework). You've given me wonderful insight. I'm writing a book about dating as spiritual practice and I've been stuck. It's a welcome reminder that relationship is a continual bid to see and be seen, listen and be heard, to choose to show up-- to ourselves and to each other. At all stages. Thank you, Rick!
That seems to be a truly unique angle to take on the subject of dating and spirituality Ako. Of course it's not uncommon for people to talk about the intersection of spirituality and committed relationship, but I'm very curious about how you specifically see that dating is a doorway to spiritual practice. I'd certainly say when we first started dating that there was a honeymoon period where being in love granted immunity from any sort of criticism or judgment of ourselves and each other. So dating someone you deeply resonate with can create a reference point for a kind of open-minded, pure-view experience. Having experienced that together we've been motivated to sustain the "honeymoon" through practice, remaining vigilant to the propensity for making assumptions, generating resentment, withholding honesty, etc over time. Anyway, it's a very intriguing idea you have. Will you be publishing essays that might become parts of that book here as you develop your ideas?
"I'm very curious about how you specifically see that dating is a doorway to spiritual practice." This is a great prompt for me. First: define spiritual. Then: what constitutes a practice? Then, getting into your question. The crux for me is relationship as spiritual practice. Dating is the ramp onto it, the doorway.
The quality of our relationships determine the felt and lived experience of our lives- how satisfied or fulfilled we might feel being alive. The stakes being in a relatinoship can feel high, depending on what value we place on it, the person who we are in it with, or the person we think we are- especially if we believe relationships a our re an indicator of our worth or lovability. Taking this into consideration, I see relationship being a deeply personal and vulnerable heat experience from which we grow. Your video demonstrating how leaders face challenges made me see that. (For anyone reading this- a must-see viewing!!! Scroll to the video on Rick's website: https://www.ricklewis.co/ ) You talk about leaders and their confidence in the face of challenging situations at work. I'm looking at people and how they can stay present to their (self) compassion, thier integrity, and their wholeness in the face of challenging and triggering moments of growth as people in relationship.
Yes to the essays. I'd love to continue the dialogue here. It's making me get clearer on my next step. Thanks for your curiosity, Rick.
Awesome. I look forward to your future posts and am happy to engage in conversation if it helps you to refine your focus or know what questions your readers might have. Such a juicy project. And thanks for checking out the video.
I loved this Ako! As I joined your for your swiping journey, I resonated with so much of what you said and also found myself learning a lot too. Dating teaches us so much!
“I’d fall in love over and over again with the same guy: they’d walk into my life in a different body, different age, and from different cities around the world.” There were many parts of your essay that stuck out, but this was one that really hit the nail on the head. Sometimes we’re in a pattern loop and don’t even realize it. Thank you for sharing, great piece!
Thank you, Michelle! Dating and Relationship is definitely a teacher! I think of it as a living lesson in vulnerability, observation, presence, action, communication, kindness, respect, and interdependence.
Love this. I would love to talk more about this journey. I encounter so many in this dilemma and would embrace a peek into your anxiousness between the pictures. Powerful.
A beautiful piece, Ako! I love the personal accounts you shared and the essence of falling in love with yourself! ‘Instead, go deeper into what gives you joy.’ So many gems in here to pick out, but I will take this one with me today. Your newsletter messages resonate and stick with me throughout the day. For this I am grateful, thank you! 🙌
Thank you, Kelly! Yes to falling in love with ourselves! I told my daughter the other day, respect is like water. It seeks its level. No one will give her more respect than the respect she offers herself. And I thought, probably the same for Love.
I appreciate your vulnerability and honesty in this writing Ako. I'm struck by what good advice this is even for those who are still in relationship, and have been for some time. The practice of self-connection, choosing yourself, updating your profile, that goes on all the time in the midst of an established healthy relationship as well. My wife and I are going on 20 years together. Fortunately we're both willing to keep doing our own work and that's what keeps us close.
I'm inspired to hear about your journey with your wife and how you see the practice of coming together (dating) apply to matured relationship (20 years together, marriage as a relationship framework). You've given me wonderful insight. I'm writing a book about dating as spiritual practice and I've been stuck. It's a welcome reminder that relationship is a continual bid to see and be seen, listen and be heard, to choose to show up-- to ourselves and to each other. At all stages. Thank you, Rick!
That seems to be a truly unique angle to take on the subject of dating and spirituality Ako. Of course it's not uncommon for people to talk about the intersection of spirituality and committed relationship, but I'm very curious about how you specifically see that dating is a doorway to spiritual practice. I'd certainly say when we first started dating that there was a honeymoon period where being in love granted immunity from any sort of criticism or judgment of ourselves and each other. So dating someone you deeply resonate with can create a reference point for a kind of open-minded, pure-view experience. Having experienced that together we've been motivated to sustain the "honeymoon" through practice, remaining vigilant to the propensity for making assumptions, generating resentment, withholding honesty, etc over time. Anyway, it's a very intriguing idea you have. Will you be publishing essays that might become parts of that book here as you develop your ideas?
"I'm very curious about how you specifically see that dating is a doorway to spiritual practice." This is a great prompt for me. First: define spiritual. Then: what constitutes a practice? Then, getting into your question. The crux for me is relationship as spiritual practice. Dating is the ramp onto it, the doorway.
The quality of our relationships determine the felt and lived experience of our lives- how satisfied or fulfilled we might feel being alive. The stakes being in a relatinoship can feel high, depending on what value we place on it, the person who we are in it with, or the person we think we are- especially if we believe relationships a our re an indicator of our worth or lovability. Taking this into consideration, I see relationship being a deeply personal and vulnerable heat experience from which we grow. Your video demonstrating how leaders face challenges made me see that. (For anyone reading this- a must-see viewing!!! Scroll to the video on Rick's website: https://www.ricklewis.co/ ) You talk about leaders and their confidence in the face of challenging situations at work. I'm looking at people and how they can stay present to their (self) compassion, thier integrity, and their wholeness in the face of challenging and triggering moments of growth as people in relationship.
Yes to the essays. I'd love to continue the dialogue here. It's making me get clearer on my next step. Thanks for your curiosity, Rick.
Awesome. I look forward to your future posts and am happy to engage in conversation if it helps you to refine your focus or know what questions your readers might have. Such a juicy project. And thanks for checking out the video.
I loved this Ako! As I joined your for your swiping journey, I resonated with so much of what you said and also found myself learning a lot too. Dating teaches us so much!
“I’d fall in love over and over again with the same guy: they’d walk into my life in a different body, different age, and from different cities around the world.” There were many parts of your essay that stuck out, but this was one that really hit the nail on the head. Sometimes we’re in a pattern loop and don’t even realize it. Thank you for sharing, great piece!
Thank you, Michelle! Dating and Relationship is definitely a teacher! I think of it as a living lesson in vulnerability, observation, presence, action, communication, kindness, respect, and interdependence.
Love this. I would love to talk more about this journey. I encounter so many in this dilemma and would embrace a peek into your anxiousness between the pictures. Powerful.